By Farzeen Amin

The first day we enter in a high school or a college we have the same feeling a child has when he enters the world. Everything is new for us, we aren’t aware of the ways, buildings and people around us. We do not know who to talk to, who to trust, we do not know who is a friend and who is a foe. The blood in our nerves run faster than normal. We are very excited to take a bigger step in our life, to get upgraded. The first day of our college is one of the most memorable days of our life. The memory of this day is not always fun and enjoyable for few people it is a nightmare they cannot get over. The ‘few people’ are getting a lot in the number with every passing year.

All of the individuals have different mindsets. We think, perceive and respond of situation in our unique way. Every brain works in a different pattern than others, you cannot predict for sure that what will be the impact of your words on others. We have become very careless towards the words we use. We have let loose over our tongues, we do not think before we speak. The type of humor has changed over the years.  Our sense of humor has become limited on judging people over their looks, dressing and apparent conditions. Your joke can be the hardest reality of others life.

To bully every freshman has become a tradition in every high school and college. Once it was a healthy tradition, there were light jokes people would crake. Students were asked to sing a funny song, tell a joke or hum a nursery rhyme. Once a refreshing tradition has now become a harsh reality. The ways to bully others have changed into coercion. Bullying is a way of oppression. Students are humiliated over their personality. They are asked to do impossible things leading with the shameful punishments. The bullies take out their frustrations on the newbie. There is a great number of students that quit going to college after their first day because they cannot face the embarrassment anymore. 

A person is always very sensitive towards the matter of dignity and self respect. The bully shed a person’s spirit to face the world. In some worst case scenario students are beaten as a punishment by bullies. There are big numbers of students that become victim of psychological disorders like depression and anxiety after the experience of being bullied.  People who cannot take it at all and they end up taking their lives.

Labeling with titles according to what they look sounds funny and cool to most of us but we cannot see where our simple humor and laughter is taking that person. The girl you called as fatso may be dealing with health issues, she might never gain confidence in her personality again. The guy you called ugly may be dealing with a lot already. The comments you made on someone’s dress may be the best he had. The guy you slapped as a punishment might never be able to return to school. Bullying has become an everyday activity. We have scores of TV programs who deliver the humor in most humiliating way, it has turned into tradition. Remember that your jokes must not oppress others as you are forbid from oppressing others in any way.

Every religion preaches love and respect. It is forbidden to hurt feeling and emotions of person especially when you are aware of doing it intentionally. Our beloved Prophet (S.A.W.W) said,  “Help your brother, whether he is an oppressor or he is oppressed.” The Prophet was asked: “It is right to help him if he is oppressed, but how should we help him if he is an oppressor?” He replied: “By preventing him from oppressing others.” (Ṣahīh Bukhāri, Volume 3, Ḥadīth 624) and In a Hadith Qudsi, Allah (SWA) has said: ‘I shall take revenge on the oppressor in this life and the next.  I shall take revenge on someone who saw a person being oppressed and was able to help him but did not help him.’   (Tabraani)

We as individuals must take responsibility of every word we utter. We must not forget that we will be questioned about it. Let’s turn this page backwards and relearn how the first day of college and school was fun not misery. Let’s not put people of the verge of death just because of our careless words. The humor should be funny for everyone not just for you and your friends. Let’s not break each other’s heart. Our lives are filed with harsh realities not be kidding about others. Be helpful to the weak, do not mock their weakness. Every human is beautiful let’s stop commenting about the facial features, the complexion of skin, the body weights and heights. Let’s learn to appreciate and spread love. Let’s together save young and beautiful lives from falling into hallucinations. Let’s not kill others. Let’s be friendly yet responsible people because all of us has only one chance to live this life. Let’s not waste this one chance for ourselves and for others.

also read https://www.careerkarwan.com/articles/parents--the-unconditional-blessing-of-allah